2 Nov 2013

Ramblings on Technological Newness

Okay, so this is new. New Samsung Laptop. New Windows 8 Operating System. New Microsoft Office. I’m overloaded with newness.

First impressions: Well, obviously it’s all very… square.

I’ve been prepared for this by the update on my Xbox 360, making the Dashboard very much square, very much advertisement based. I guess that’s something actually – there’s no ads here. That can only be a good thing.

The start menu is now a screen full of squares, as opposed to the good old desktop with program icons. You can get to the desktop interface, but only begrudgingly. You can tell the operating system wants you to use this new display. Never have I seen something changed so drastically. It’s like they’ve completely torn down the established norm and rebuilt it from the ground up.

Mac OS and Windows have always been, at the heart of it, similar. Their OS displays have always been pretty user friendly and if you can use one, chances are you'll get the hand of the other pretty quickly. This just changes everything and throws the ball up in the air. What remains to be seen is if Microsoft catches it or fumbles and drops it to the ground.

I don’t even know why I’m writing this, here on my new version of Microsoft Office Word. Just trying it all out I suppose. I’ll probably put it on my blog or something. (And oh look, I did). Or stick it on this new-fangled SkyDrive thingy and try that out. In fact, you can tell it's official Microsoft shiz ‘cos Word just corrected ‘Skydrive’ to ‘SkyDrive’. God forbid I miss out the capital in the middle of the word.

Capitals in the middle of words are one of these new ‘stylish’ things companies implement nowadays, and to me they are equally as horrendous as all this lack of capitalisation going on. You just do it how it’s meant to be done okay? Not too much, not none at all. I mean, would it be that hard for it to be just ‘Skydrive’? Or Sky Drive? Or even Sky-Drive?

Perhaps they don’t want any confusion with skydiving.

The touchpad on this thing is also very new and weird to me. There is no left or right click button. It’s just the whole thing itself is a button. I’m used to using two hand, one finger on the left click the other on the pad. But no, it’s just mouse over something, click and drag – with that one finger. Gonna take some getting used to.

The display itself does look very clean and crisp, it’s all sharp edges and, as I said before, squares. Squares everywhere. Forget Orange, the future is square.

The modern look is very appealing. But then, what is modern? Anything new and innovative, I guess, so that must be what this is.

Oh, and the damn thing came with Norton. I hate Norton. Not Edward Norton though, he’s a sound guy. But I can’t help but think of him every time I see the software and now every time I watch Fight Club or the Illusionist or the Incredible Hulk all I can see is crappy anti-virus software.

Okay, I’m being unfair. I’m sure the software itself is brilliant. What I don’t like about Norton is the fact it has permeated the entire technology sector. It came pre-installed on this laptop, and every other flipping computer I’ve seen recently. It’s important to have security software at the very beginning of your laptop’s life, I get that, but I’d like to choose my own, thanks.

For one company to have such a monopoly on this area really ticks me off. I got a copy of another security software with my laptop (not knowing it had Norton), and immediately just got rid of Norton in favour of this newer more friendly software. When the new security program offered to remove Norton for me, I joyously clicked the ‘yes’ button. But I was shocked to see that when I began uninstalling it, Norton threw offers in my face.

‘Are you sure you want to uninstall me? You’ve got sixty days left of this trial version. Get the full version instead for this price blah blah blah.’

‘Don’t uninstall me. I’ll be your best friend. I promise.’

No. I wouldn’t call myself the most technologically literate person you’d ever meet, but I know what I’m doing. I know I don’t like Norton. Just take it like a man, you silly program, and accept defeat. You’ve gotten so used to being at the top that for someone to refuse you just confounds you, and it shouldn’t. Grow a pair, Norton.

The touchpad is very much linking into the new fad of touchscreenedness (yes that’s a word) found in devices nowadays. Some of the laptops even had touchscreen built in as well. I’ve got no idea what that would have been like. Why you would need touchscreen as well as a built in touchpad and keyboard, I have no idea. They weren’t even the flippy new ones where you turn the screen round and use it like a tablet.

This touchpad is confusing enough. As stated before there’s no left and right click. Clicking at the bottom on the left or right achieves the same effect but it is obviously not intended to be used so. Scrolling is achieved by using two fingers to swipe across the pad, a feature new to me. In addition to this, zooming can be accomplished by swiping two fingers together or apart on the pad, something borrowed from touch devices such as the iPhone.

So overall this new laptop is very much spanglier than my crappy old one. With this and the new TV I also bought (also Samsung) I feel very much technologically up-to-date, something I haven’t felt in a long while.

For now, my readers (however little of you there are) I bid you adieu, and leave to go play with my new toys.

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